Hard Decisions

We just love those two little faces. That day was a great day. The weather was perfect for a drive so we went up to the white mountains. Upon seeing not one single cloud in the sky, we decided to drive up Mt. Washington, something Mike and I had both done seperately, but we've never done as a family. What a sight. Breathtaking doesn't begin to describe the absolute beauty that God placed at the top of that mountain.

It was chilly and breezy and the entire time Ethan kept shivering...loudly...but between the fesh mountain air, the bright sunshine, and my family surrounding me, this picture puts everything into perspective.

We can climb any mountain that stands in our way.

The most recent mountain is one of the main reasons why I haven't been able to post lately. Other than the normal day-to-day business of life, we've run into a few mountains that have been more difficult to see around much less climb. Because of this Mike and I spent most of last night making a very difficult decision.

As most of you know, we added to our lives the insanity known as Moose our Red Bone Coon Hound. He is currently 15 weeks old, almost 4 months, and come to find out he is developmentally delayed. In other words, he should have some of his adult teeth coming in by now, and he has none. He shouldn't be having nearly as many issues with house training as he is at this point. He's incredibly smart when it comes to the obedience commands of sit, and leave it and stay...somewhat. But as of late that mountain I was telling you about has come into view.

Ethan has been...difficult to say the least. We have noticed changes in him that have become very difficult to deal with on an hour-to-hour basis, never mind day-to-day. He needs much more one-on-one time than I've been able to give him, and in combination with some new developmental stages he's going through at this time, has become very difficult to discipline. He has begun to show fears to things that have never bothered him before. For instance, he is very concerned about where the phone is at all times, and needs it to be blocked from his site if it rings. When it does ring, he yells throughout the house "mommy the phone is ringing", and if it is in reach will bring it to me immediately so I can answer it and make it stop ringing. He will even make sure it is where it belongs upstairs in our bedroom before he goes to bed at night.

Joshua is going through this same stage, except his sudden fear is for the bathtub. He can't wait to get into it, but as soon as his little feet touch the bottom, he's scrambling to get back out. These are normal stages for children to go through. We were told that Ethan may hit some of these stages now that he's feeling better, because he didn't hit them when he was supposed to like Joshua is. However, these stages are coming at a time where a soon-to-be four year olds mind has already developed. His emotions and outrages are quick and intense. They involve his whole entire body, and you can tell from the look in his eyes that he doesn't know how to stop it. We just have to squeeze his whole body tightly to ours while whispering to him to relax and breath, until it passes. Some days it is easier for me to deal with than others. Being 28 weeks pregnant and incredibly hormonal, some days I'd like to flip out like he does.

Having said all that, what could be our difficult decision, our mountain to climb? Well, we've decided that we simply cannot divide our one-on-one time between our children, one of which needs physical activity, yet less stimulation...and our developmentally delayed puppy. We need to find a new loving home for Moose.

I didn't sleep at all last night, not so much because I doubted our decision, more because I'm concerned about the damage that may or may not have been done. Every Mom out there worries at one time or another if they are doing everything right for their children. Do we discipline enough or too much? Do we yell all day every day, or do we give in to our children's every whim? Parenting is tough enough. Raising a puppy is challenging enough. Trying to do both when both need special attention and time from one person throughout the day...I just don't have it.

So, for our children's sake we will find a new home for Moose. One where he can have the attention he needs to become the best pet he can be. One where neither he nor Ethan will become so overstimulated from each other that neither one of them can behave...(urinating all over the house/throwing a major emotional meltdown) Unfortunately it won't happen in this house.

If anyone knows of a loving caring home, preferably one without young children that would love to adopt our Moose please let us know. We don't want him to just go to anyone. We love him, and will miss him in our lives, but know that he will be much better off with a family that can give him the attention he needs.