Rebekah

No pictures please...


Okay...maybe just one!


Hey...wait a minute...I said just one!


Alright...if you must...


...besides, the camera LOVES me!

Our Weekend with the Grandparents

First of all...a great big THANK YOU to my parents. We spent the entire weekend from 5pm on Friday (when we arrived) through 6:30pm on Sunday (when we left) up there in Maine! We haven't been up there since before Rebekah was born, and the few times before that we only went up for the day and maybe one overnight. It had become so difficult to travel with all of the food we had to cart with us, and we were still novices when it came to what we could and couldn't eat at the time. This time however, my parents, in an effort to help us out so we could spend the whole weekend without bringing our own refrigerator and cupboard of goodies, went shopping to pick up what it was we would need. Again, thank you for doing that. You don't know how much easier you made it for us.

Having done all of that, we were able to really sit back and just enjoy the weekend. When we arrived Friday night, it was just in time to let the boys play a little in the sandbox before bath and bed. (They were exhausted from blueberry picking that morning...see previous post)

We began our Saturday morning with a tasty breakfast and coffee, before heading outside. We wanted to try to keep the kids semi-clean because we were going to visit their Great-Grandmother in the nursing home over in Portland. Little did we know that Uncle Larry planned to wash his truck that morning...and the boys decided to help!

They actually did pretty well in staying dry...mostly due to Uncle Larry not relinquishing control over the hose! It's amazing how much fun soap bubbles, water, and a rag can be!! They had a great time when we did our cars a few weekends ago...so they were quite experienced!


When they were done, we packed up and headed to Portland to visit my grandmother. She has dementia as well as several other medical conditions that require her to have constant care...she's been there for close to a year now! It's heartbreaking to see her there especially when the one thing she remembers and wants so badly...is just to go home. (She thinks home is back where she grew up when she was a little girl)

Anyway, I haven't seen her since before Rebekah was born, and wanted to have her see her great-grand kids. It always puts a smile on her face. Plus, we discovered a new snack for her to enjoy...Pirate Booty. She doesn't eat much anymore, and what she does eat she tends to complain about. The Pirate Booty however, she ate non-stop, right from the kids snack container!! She even asked my Mom to buy some more for her to bring at the next visit.

Sorry for the long post...we just had such a great time...and took a lot of pictures that just need to be posted!! :)

When we came back from that visit, we had some lunch and then went swimming! We haven't been swimming in a very long time...but Ethan remembered the pool. Joshua wasn't walking the last time we were there, so wasn't nearly as excited at the prospect of this "swimming thing".


As you can see the boys had swimmies on this time. Mike and I aren't big fans of using them because we want the kids to learn how to swim properly..,but since we so rarely go swimming, (and we haven't the money for swim lessons right now)we figured it would be a good idea due to Ethan's impulsiveness! Ethan thought it was great, and after awhile we were able to take them off so he could swim under the water. Great workout for the upper body muscle tone. Joshua didn't like them at all, so we took them off. He had no interest in leaving my body. If he could have I think he would have sat on top of my head the whole time and maybe just dunk his feet in. He was much happier sitting on the steps doing just that.

It was a wonderful Saturday, and the kids were absolutely exhausted after all of the fresh air and exercise...we spoiled them with Snickers Ice Cream Bars for supper, (yup, 100% gluten free!)and then got them in bed.
I'll post pictures and such for Sunday later...Rebekah is done with sitting in my lap while doing this post.

Out and About

As our family grows, we (I should say "I" since during the week all outings are done by yours truly!) find it more of a challenge just to get out of the house never mind to a final destination!!

Although it has slowed us down a bit, I nevertheless venture out with my three little monkeys in our "Van O Kids" to various destinations. Usually, I have my sanity somewhat in tact before we leave, rarely do I have it when we come home!

On this particular day, Friday the 13th, I was prepared to travel and meet a friend with three of her own little monkeys...so I new I'd be in good company.

We decided to head out blueberry picking at this little place called Blueberry Bay Farm in Stratham, NH. We had gone there last year...and the blueberries were fantastic. The kids had a great time sampling from the bush, and absolutely loved the Blueberry Lemonade (yes, now I remember having it last year!). At the time, between my friend and I we only had four of our little ones...this time we were seriously outnumbered.

I know I really shouldn't have, but I was prepared for the worst...exasperation followed by much yelling, disciplining, and threats to leave if things didn't change...but was pleasantly surprised by how great everything went.All of the kids seemed to really enjoy themselves...Ethan and his friend walked, (ran mostly, as well as jump and fall down whenever they could) Joshua and his friend got to ride in the wagon that I brought, and the babies took turns riding in front packs and the stroller. Not only did we manage to pick a couple of pounds of blueberries, but we even made it back to the cars to have a little picnic lunch before going.

All and all we had a great morning...and lots of yummy blueberries as well!

Birthday Cake Fun...vroom, vroom

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What fun is having your cake if you can't PLAY in it too?

Happy Birthday Joshua!

"Rockets are Red

Firecrackers are Blue

4th of July is fun

'cuz I'm with you."

That's right, two years ago on this day, we had our own little firecracker rocket into our lives...Joshua Scott Ouellette.

To this day, Joshua is the brightest and loudest firecracker we've ever seen!! He may be small for his age, but he's feisty and spirited. Although we may find his "shyness" and strong will difficult now, we know it will serve him well as he gets older. He may not take to everyone easily, but once he does, you know you are a friend for life. When he laughs, you can't help but laugh along with him, and you can tell by the gleam in his eye, that he gets a lot more of what's going on than you think.

We love you Joshua...more than you'll ever know...Happy Birthday little guy!

Tattoos (Temporary)

What to do on an incredibly hazy, hot and humid summer day??

TATTOOS of course!

They are much easier than those darn permanent ones that never rub off, and they are virtually painless...well unless your Josh, and the mere touch of cold, wet water makes you scream!

I finally had to cut them both off from their addiction, other wise I would have lost them under all of those Thomas the Tank Engine tatoos.

Changes

Ethan finally had some OT yesterday. It had been three weeks since his last session due to circumstances. Boy, did he need his therapy. We can most definitely tell when he has gone without. Even Jessica, his OT can tell when he's gone without. We haven't been doing his Therapeutic Listening either...bad mommy...I just don't remember!

However, we are now going to have to prepare Ethan for a change. Miss Jess, as Ethan calls her, will be leaving Easter Seals. The change will happen at the end of August. We were hoping to help him transition to another OT that he's worked with in the past. Unfortunately, they are all booked up, and haven't a slot of time to put him in. So, not only will he not see Jessica anymore, but he may not receive OT there anymore.

That may be a problem for a couple of reasons...he loves to play in that room (and who wouldn't?? It's a child's play land!). He also has made a great friend with the receptionist, Kathy. I'm not sure if it's because she actually listens to what he has to say, let's him sit behind the desk with her, or gives him chocolate kisses when he comes out of therapy, (hmmm) but he will definitely miss seeing her as well.

All I know, is that therapy won't be the same without Miss Jess. She is absolutely awesome with him. You can tell she loves to work with the kids because they just love to be with her.

As we were leaving yesterday, we parted ways saying our goodbyes, as usual. Well, Ethan stopped dead in his tracks, said "hold up, hold up, wait a minute, I forgot something" and went racing back to Jessica to give her a big hug and kiss, and to tell her he loved her. Jessica and I looked at each other and without saying anything...just new that this one is gonna be tough.

Where's Joshua??

It never ceases to amaze me where this child will and won't sleep!

Can you find him??

Lazy, Hazy Days

Well, it's June...according to the calendar...and although I'm not one for heat and humidity and truly enjoy these cool nights, and breezy cool/warm days, it's kind of weird not to be sweltering in the heat! I think it was hotter in April!

Anyway, we've had some great days...and some not so great days. One of these great days involved a sand box out in our back yard, (courtesy of the Taylor children who have outgrown it...thank you!) Our kiddos are obsessed with it. We had a yard sale a few weekends ago, and the boys played in there for at least two hours...straight!!

Needless to say with a combination of copious amounts of sunscreen and bug spray, sand was stuck EVERYWHERE!! So, when we dragged them inside (with much wailing and grinding of teeth) we had to bathe them.

Out of that mess we got the Dynamic Diaper Duo!

To say that Ethan is obsessed with Veggie Tales Larry Boy would be a serious understatement. Morning, noon and night this child wants to watch either Larry Boy and Bad Apple, or Moe and the Big Exit. Both excellent videos that teach about temptation, (Larry Boy) and following God's direction, (Moe).

We've also had some not so good days. For instance; Ethan has recently become very sensitive to noises...especially loud ones. For any of you who know Joshua, this is most definitely a problem. Rebekah's cries don't bother Ethan other than he wants her attended to. Usually, (just like with the phone) along with Rebekah's cries I hear Ethan from somewhere in the house "Mama, your girl is crying", over and over until she has been attended to. But with Joshua's "noise" which is worse than the screech of the Ring Wraiths from Lord of The Rings, Ethan feels it necessary to either lash out physically...hitting Joshua over the head with a symbol for example...or verbally...yelling louder by singing the marching song of the "mob of angry Sporks" from the Veggie Tales video Lord of The Beans...(coincidence???)

Anyway, either action results in a much louder Joshua because, being a toddler, he can't have his needs go unnoticed, and therefore must get louder and more insistent. Let's just say, I've become a little sensitive to noises myself, and prefer to bury my head in a hole somewhere whenever possible.

The problem we have with these behaviors is that we don't know how to separate out 4 yr old behavior, SI Dysfunction, and Asperger Syndrome. We are hoping to have a Behavior Therapist come to our house to see him in this environment and help us out with discerning this. Until then it's difficult to "fix it" because if it's the first one, then there needs to be a punishment of some sort, if it's the latter two, then we need to do some sort of intervention and therapy to help prevent it in the future. My head spins every time Ethan does something because I never know if I'm overreacting, or under reacting. Should he be punished, or should it be noted and find a way to prevent it from occurring the next time? Sometimes I think it would be easier if he'd been my second child because then maybe I'd have an idea of what to expect. But then I think, all kids are different, even within the same family, so it wouldn't really matter anyway.

We've found ourselves turning more and more to God, praying, and really trying to Let Go and Let God, as a friend from my bible study said to me. It's hard to let go of that control and trust in God to provide us with the answers we so desperately seek. So, for those of you who have been praying for us...we thank you from our hearts. Please keep our family in your prayers, because it has helped get us this far, and for that we are truly blessed.

Big Brother Ethan taking care of Joshua at Spectrum Gymnastics during the Taylor birthday party.

My Husband

Father's Day isn't until next month, but I wanted to write this post today to let you all know how special my husband is to me.

I don't need to wait until a special day to tell the man I love just how much I appreciate and love him very much. So, for those of you who aren't into gushy, gooey, lovey kinds of words...consider your self warned and don't read this post!

As for the rest of you...let me tell you why I love this man:


He is my best friend: he is always there. He has seen me at my worst and at my best. He has stuck beside me through more than anyone I've ever met, and I know I can confide in him with all of my heart and soul.

He is my lover: (ya-ya) he is always patient, especially during these post-partum months when all I want to do with my free time is sleep.

He is the father to my children: he is a large child, role model, and disciplinarian all wrapped up in one. Our children know they can go to him for roughhousing, as well as comfort and they both long to be with him when he's not around. (Especially if he's out "jeep'n")

He is my husband, my soul mate: "for better or worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health" we promised to love and respect each other for all the days of our lives. Yes, we've only been married for 6 1/2 years, but lets face it, we've had a roller coaster ride.



From our children being hospitalized for various reasons to all of the medications we've had to do at all hours of the day and night, he's always been there.

For every phone call he's received from an incredibly frustrated wife because the kids are being loud, the bills have piled up, and the sink is no where to be found, he's always on the other side listening.

For every night he comes home from work to a disorganized house, whiny kids, exhausted wife, and dinner still not ready, he drops his bag, removes his tie, rolls up his sleeves and digs right in to help.

For every time he hugs me even when I don't want to be...I love him.
For every time he lets me calm down, and work things through...I love him.
For every time he takes the kids, so I can have a few moments...I love him.
For every time he tells me to do something for myself...I love him.
For every tear he has wiped away...
For every time he helps me back up when I've fallen...
For every thing above and so much more...
I am thankful for, blessed to have, so grateful for the love he has for me.

I LOVE YOU, MICHAEL!

Late Mother's Day Thanks . . . Again

Well better late than never.

Once again I am writing this from work so I will try to get some pix up tonight.

I went back to last year's post about Mother's Day and a few things have changed. We did not spend it in a hospital (thank God) and now we have three children.

A few things have not changed. Michelle is still an amazing mother. She stays at home with 3 children, going from the moment she gets up until the kids are in bed. And even then Rebekah is still nursing. She goes from playdate to therapy to doctors appointments, and that's all in one day!

She works harder than I do. I know I've spent the day with just the boys and I am drained at the end of the day. She takes care of 3 everyday. I don't know where she gets the strength. It amazes me everytime I come home. Plus she has me to put up with me as well!

So from you three children "We Love Mom!".

Happy Late Mother's Day!

Love,

All of us!
(with a little help from daddy)

Some New Stuff...

Okay, so I've written this post a couple of times now, deleted and started over. I just haven't figured out a way to put into words what I'd like to say. I've decided to take the say-what-I-have-to-say route and go from there.

First off...Ethan was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome last Thursday.
Secondly...he needs to have his adenoids removed and that is scheduled for the 15th of June.

There...I said it.

Now a definition: "Asperger Syndrome (also called Asperger Disorder) is a neurological condition that affects social and emotional interaction. It is a developmental disability, which means that it is most likely present at birth and affects development throughout life." - Asperger Syndrome and Your Child: A Parent's Guide

Within Asperger Syndrome (AS) there are various levels of severity. These levels are based on four essential qualities that characterize children with AS. They are impaired social interaction, impaired communication, repetitive or odd patterns of behavior or interests, and unusual responses to stimulation and environment. Ethan has a mild form of all of these. Some are easier to notice than others and if you aren't around him often, you may not even notice. Most times AS isn't diagnosed until children reach the preschool/kindergarten years because that is the time that their social world really begins to expand.

Now, Ethan wasn't enrolled in a 3yr. old preschool for several reasons. 1. three years old is too young to start "school" in our opinion unless there is a developmental reason; 2. we want to home school our children; 3. we were expecting our third child at the time and didn't want him to connect his leaving for school with the arrival of his sister and 4. he isn't potty trained yet!

However, we have a meeting on the 18th to determine where and when he will go to a developmental preschool. The Developmental Pediatrician who diagnosed Ethan, wants him in a program that is 3 half days a week so that he can be part of the social aspect of school, but still receive the therapy he needs. He is to continue his occupational therapy with Jessica through Easter Seals, and receive therapy from a behaviorist, and a speech therapist while attending school. The speech therapist will help him with language pragmatics, (non-verbal cues, body language, personal space, etc.) as well as communication, (how to ask a group of kids if he can join them in a game, respond to questions with appropriate answers etc.) The behaviorist will teach him appropriate ways to act and respond in social situations.

I could go on and on with all the info. there is on this topic, but as it is it has taken me several days just to write this. So, I will refer you to a website: www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/ Go to the menu bar on the left of the site and click on "What is AS?" It gives you more information than I could as I'm still trying to understand it all. I will warn you though, for those of you who don't know, AS is considered part of the autistic spectrum. So everything you read will in some way be related to autism. Everyone we've told so far has taken the news differently. Thankfully we have a great network of support from friends and family.

As for the adenoids...well through a sleep study we found out that the snoring that Ethan does, wakes him up several times throughout the night. Because of this he doesn't get the obvious rest he needs, which can then lead to behavioral issues. This doesn't mean that once his adenoids are removed he will suddenly be this well behaved angel of a child...but as his doctor stated..."it certainly won't make things worse to have a child whose had a good nights sleep!" Because Ethan will need to be taught so many of the behaviors he should have learned over time, the better rested he is, he will not only learn new things but also be able to retain them.

Easter Time

Happy Easter! Okay so it's a little late...buy you have three little children under the age of 5 and see how long it takes you to post something!! :) I load the pictures on one day and then several days later, get to the writing part of things!

Anyway, we had a wonderful day. It didn't turn out the way WE had wanted it to, but it still ended up being a beautiful Easter. Here's why:

We didn't go to church as a family...Mike had gone to the Easter Vigil to watch some friends receive their sacraments to become members of the Catholic faith on Saturday night, so I went to Sunday morning mass at 8am with Rebekah!

We didn't do an Easter Egg Hunt...we usually attend our friends hunt at their house but this year due to the snow on the ground the eggs couldn't be hidden outside. So they had to cancel it. It would have way too much to have that many children in their house hunting eggs.

We didn't make the kids their Easter Baskets, (er the Easter Bunny didn't)...with all of the illnesses, hospitalizations, new baby, tired mommy, inability to get out of the house and do any kind of sane shopping, and a serious lack of money due to the above...we just didn't get around to it. Plus, I have to admit, I knew they would be spoiled by their grandparents, (thank you Grammy, Grampy, Pepere, and Anne Marie).

They were also surprised by their Auntie Lee Anne and Uncle Pete who sent them a gluten free basket in the mail from a bakery in California. It had chocolate covered peeps, pretzels, and marshmallows. It also had two different kinds of flavored popcorn as well as some chocolate chip cookies. It even came with a little blue bunny and a plastic basket. Then their Auntie Lori and Uncle Dan gave them the ultimate treat...a large box of Junior Mints (for each of them), also known simply as Juniors. Ya, I don't think they noticed a lack of baskets from us!

What we did do...we had a terrific tasting gluten free coffee cake (Gluten Free Pantry Coffee Cake Mix) with the kids, followed by a fantastic meal as a family with Grammy, Grampy, Auntie Sherry, Uncle Mark and cousin Jack. We followed that up with chocolate fondue at Auntie Lori and Uncle Dan's house where we visited with Auntie Lee Anne, Uncle Pete, Pepere, Anne Marie, and cousins Ian and Emma.

We dressed the kids up in their Easter outfits because how often do you get to see your children looking so handsome and pretty in pastels?? (Looking at the thumbnails of all of those pictures makes them look like Easter eggs.!)

"That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil-this is the gift of God." Ecclesiastes 3:13

We ate, we drank, and at the end of the day we were able to count our many blessings from our family. Our children were tucked into their little beds at the end of the day...full of chocolate...but tired, happy and loved. What more could we ask for...it wasn't perfect in our eyes, but it was the way it was meant to be. Maybe it's my age...(32), maybe it's having been married...(6 1/2 yrs.), maybe it's from being pregnant so many times...(4), all I know is I've come to trust in God more now than at any other time in my life. What better time to find trust in Him than at Easter time. Just look at my three beautiful little blessings.

Therapeutic Listening (TL)

"Therapeutic Listening (TL) is an expansion of Sensory Integration (SI). It is an auditory intervention that uses the organized sound patterns inherent in music to impact all levels of the nervous system. Auditory information from TL CDs provides direct input to both the vestibular and the auditory portions for the vestibular-cochlear continuum. The emphasis of TL is on blending sound intervention strategies with vestibulo-proprioceptive, core development, and breath activities so as to sustain grounding and centering of the body and mind in space and time. Providing these postural, movement, and respiratory activities as part of the TL program is critical." In other words...our ability to function in our world relies heavily on what we hear and how we perceive it. Listening is completely voluntary, and when we use it our ability to monitor and then actively respond to changes in our environment, happens without us even aware of it.

Above I mentioned the vestibular-cochlear continuum. Basically it's the link between the two systems and how they effect they way we act or react in situations. The cochlea, utricle, saccule , and semicircular canals form the the bony labyrinth in the inner ear. This processes the higher frequency vibrations that we know as sound. The vestibular end of the canal, processes the lower frequency vibration that we call movement. They work together to send information to the brain to help us function and exist in our surroundings.

The program involves listening to a CD that varies in musical style, types of filtering, and levels of complexity. The music is electronically altered to elicit the orienting response which sets up the body for sustained attention and active listening. (Note: I listened to this music and I thought I was going to grind my teeth out of my head! That's how "altered" the music is. Ethan listens it to without question...doesn't notice a difference!) A new CD is introduced every 2 weeks and the program is completed in three months. Then the child is put on a "maintenance" CD for a while after the initial treatment.

Ethan is on week 5, his third CD. He is supposed to do his "listening" twice a day for 30 minutes each session. We at least get it done once a day. We try to set him up with coloring, playing in his kidney beans, or playing his new favorite game of Hungry, Hungry Hippos. He can do anything while listening to his music except watch TV. We've done it in the car, but problems arise with the headset fitting on his head within the confines of his car seat. It's a lot tougher than I thought to get the second session in during the course of the day though. We do our best.

His OT, Jessica says that she has noticed an improvement in some of his vestibluar (movement) areas. We have noticed that Ethan is now hearing things that he's never noticed before like the birds chirping (which he became quite angry at the other day because they were too noisy!!)

Unfortunately, (like anything else) things have gotten worse instead of better. We were warned that as changes occured in his system, these things would happen...frustration, anger, testing. All of which are normal 4 year old issues, but more so than usual. We are only half way through the treatment, so we'll see what the future holds.

Hospital Free Weekend

Mike here, just so you know. (Side note to Michelle: please feel free to insert pictures as you see fit. Seeing as I am writing this from work.)

Anyway we had a good weekend. No children were in the hospital. Got some amount of sleep and I actually got out to see a movie with my brother. Can't tell you the last time we did that. Oh by the way 300 is an excellent movie - just not for the kids.

We went for a family walk on Saturday and Ethan and to a lesser extent Joshua played at the playground. Giving me a mild heart attack all the while. Ethan is a little monkey and was climbing up and jumping across bars, slides and ladders. Which is exactly what he needs but made me a bit nervous seeing as he did not always pay attention to what he was doing. But he had a blast never the less.

Then there was Joshua coming out of being sick for three or so weeks sat in the wagon and ate everyting in sight. His brother was not around so he was taking full advantage of the peace and quite to eat. He is his father's son after all.

Then on Sunday my cousin came over to watch the boys while Michelle, Rebekah and I went to Mass and Barnes & Noble. Traveling with one baby seemed extremely easy, don't know why it seemed like work the first time around.

All in all a good weekend.

Now only if the weather would match the calendar.

later
.mike

In Like a Lion

My big guy has had an interesting month. He has BEEN the lion. Being the oldest he is use to getting a lot of attention. Mostly because he can speak so well, and enjoys carrying on a conversation with almost anyone who is willing to listen and converse back. However, between his new little sister, and the illnesses that Joshua has been dealing with, a lot of that attention has been diverted...and it shows. Ethan has still been receiving attention, unfortunately it has been negative attention. The trouble this little man can cause is amazing. It's been impossible though to make sure that Ethan gets the playtime, "mommy time" and "daddy time" he's needed, with a very sick little brother, and a new little sister. We were doing pretty well before all of Joshua's illnesses...not so much now.

Then, of course, there is Joshua. He looks pretty happy here...that was last month! He is sick yet again. This time he has the stomach bug. He had been home for two days, and woke up Friday morning having vomited all over his bed. He continued with that for the rest of the day, and has since been clingy, irritable, and very sensitive to everything going on around him. The poor little guy has been sick for 20 days as of this past Sunday. (This whole thing started Sunday night Feb. 25) He just can't seem to catch a break.

Now, this morning, he woke up at 5:30am covered in spots!! He has a moderate fever, and is absolutely miserable. We will be going in to the doctors this morning. They think it might be a delayed reaction to some of the meds he's been on. I hope so, this poor little guy needs to get better!

Lastly, we have Rebekah. She has been an angel of a third child. Unfortunately her days are spent either in her carseat or in the bouncy chair at home, but to make up for the lack of attention, she has been sleeping nights in our bed. We couldn't have asked for a more "go with the flow" child. She will let anyone hold her, (unless it's feeding time!) and has proven time and time again that she is ready and willing to adapt to her surroundings. Thank God for that. Most of her pictures though will be like the one above. Well, at least she has some pictures right?? :)

We have definitely had a rough month, but as the saying goes "In like a lion and out like a lamb", we'll see!

A Powerful Virus...and then some

So, we move on to Friday. Joshua had a rough night...so did Mike...he just couldn't sleep with all of the coughing. Since we made the executive decision that Ethan should go hang out with another family for the day, we called his Aunt and Uncle to see if he could stay with them for the day. I had a feeling the day wasn't going to be pleasant...I had no idea we'd end up in the hospital!

Joshua would just follow me around the house, sit down wherever I stopped and just moan. With every breath he would moan and cough, constantly. That and play with his ears. We've come to the conclusion that unlike his brother's attachment to a blankie and kitty, Josh is attached to his ears...literally. He plays with them to comfort himself.


I decided to help get him to sleep I would take a drive. He always falls asleep and sleeps well in the car. So, I fed and placed Rebekah in her car seat. When I turned around expecting to find Joshua behind me, I saw him in the playroom, curled up on the bean bag fast asleep.

About 45 min. later he woke up, not feeling any better, so we went for that drive.

He slept for another 15 min. but when he woke up, didn't look right. I drove over to Mike's work to get another opinion. We called the doctor because he just didn't seem right. This is when my mother's instincts kicked in. I wasn't sure he was bad enough to go to the ER, but at the same time, he wasn't looking so good. He was all one color...very ashen...and his breathing was incredibly rapid. He seemed to be struggling. Instead of waiting for the doctor to call us back, Mike took the rest of the day and drove us over to the office. I walked in with him, and with one look they brought him into the treatment room to check his stats. His oxygen levels were at 76%. They should be between 92-100%. Then they decided to listen to his breathing and when he started to cry, his O2 stats went up into the 80's. So, they put him on oxygen and then gave him a nebulizing (sp?) treatment. He practically passed out.

At this point I have to say, although we were worried, we didn't think we would need to go to the hospital. The staff at Pediatric Associates did such a great job remaining calm throughout the ordeal, that we were surprised when the doctor came in and said "You've probably guessed by now that we will be admitting him to the hospital."

So, over to the Elliot we went. We checked in on Friday the 9th and didn't get discharged until Tuesday the 13th! It was a very long weekend.

My poor little guy was just struggling so hard to breath. They couldn't determine if it was asthma or if it was just a virus that had settled and caused the extreme inflammation in his lungs. Not that it really matters because the treatment for either one is the same. They don't like to diagnose asthma under the age of 2-3, so they diagnosed it viral.

Mind you, he was treated for walking pneumonia as well. We had gone in to the office on Tuesday the 6th for Rebekah's well visit, and the doctor was very concerned with his cough. She took a listen and said that he now clinically sounded like what little bit of something they saw on the xray from the previous week. She felt it would be best to put him on antibiotics for pneumonia.

The poor little guy, although weak from the endless coughing, difficulty breathing, and very little sleep, was incredibly strong when it came to fending off the respiratory nurses...his arch enemies! They were extremely nice and patient with him, even though he learned how to use his IV arm as a weapon. (That little board under his arm to keep him from bending it, hurts a lot when he bops you in the head!) He got to the point where if they even poked their heads into the room, he would bury his face and start crying. Even in a dead sleep, once they turned the nebulizing machine on, he would wake up and immediately start crying. Who new that breathing in all that oxygen and medicated steam could be so traumatizing? Apparently it was because he cried through every single treatment. (We think that may have been one of the reasons why it took so long for him to get better. When he would cry, the medication wouldn't get inhaled properly. So, that's why they decided to put him on IV steroids to see if they could attack the problem from the inside as well, and try to make his lungs less inflammed.)

Even with his regular nurses, he would wave his arms and cry if they even tried to touch him. He had his little bubble around him, and if they got too close he would say "no no no no" and try to fend them off. Thank God they have a lot of patience, kindness, and perseverance, other wise we'd probably still be there!

Over the course of those five days we learned many things. We figured out that a Daddy is great for comforting when the Mommy isn't around, but the minute the Mommy shows up, the Daddy no longer exists. I found out how heartbreaking it is to leave one of my baby's behind at the hospital crying "Mama", so I could go home and take care of the other two. Mike found out how hard it is to get Joshua to rest when all he wants is Mama and not Dada all night. We were also reminded at how very blessed we are to have such great family and friends to help us out during such a difficult time.

With many thanks to Dan and Lori for taking Ethan all weekend, Friday through Sunday night, including an overnight, (even though you managed to lose him...in your bedroom!:), we couldn't have both been there for Josh and each other with a 4 year old running around the hospital room.

Thanks to Terrie, Norma and Deb for bringing yummy, hot food, coffee, and strong, caring arms to hold on to Rebekah so I could use my arms to hold onto Josh, and we could actually eat something besides veggie chips.

Thank you to Sherry for taking Ethan during the weekdays so that we could again be there for Josh, and handle the discharge from the hospital with all of the many directions and uses of the medications he would be on.

A great big thank you to all of the nurses, doctors and staff at Elliot Hospital. They were all great at keeping us updated, calm, and cheery despite the circumstances. Thanks to their hard work and dedication we were able to bring our little guy home safe and sound.

And thank you to everyone else for your thoughts, phone calls and prayers. You helped keep us connected to what was most important...our family.

Needless to say, we weren't the only ones who were glad to be home. Joshua was like a whole new kid. Even the last two days in the hospital, we could tell he was getting back to himself because he was becoming restless in the bed. We let him walk around a little in those cute little jammies they put on him, but it wasn't enough. Who could blame him. The only reason they were keeping him those last few days was because when he would inhale, he would still retract enough that they were concerned about a relapse if he went home. Come Tuesday morning though, with no retractions what so ever, we were discharged from the hospital with strict intstructions on nebulizing every 4 hours over the first 48 hours, and then once a day for the next two weeks.

We didn't care though, no matter how much work and how little sleep we were going to get, we were all just happy to be home.

A Powerful Virus

A little over two weeks ago, our family came down with some sort of virus. You know the one...cough, runny nose, irritability, cranky, fussy, and tired.

Well, Josh got the worst of it. He ended up with a moderate fever for most of the first week. It got to the point where it spiked up to 104 degrees and he was brought into the ER for a chest x-ray to check for pneumonia.

A little bit scary...for me because I couldn't go with him. Not because I don't trust my husband with him...far from it...but he's my baby and I wanted to be with him. Unfortunately the ER isn't the place for healthy infants, so I stayed behind. The good news is they came home with a positive report that his lungs looked fairly healthy. That was Wednesday the 28th of Feb. However, if his fever persisted through Saturday we were to come back in to have him evaluated again.


Well, needless to say, the fever went away Friday night, but the cough persisted. My poor little guy was just exhausted from coughing so much. He was falling asleep where ever he could. Well, at least where Ethan wasn't around. (Thank God for that train set upstairs!)


I wasn't too worried yet, because the fever left, and from past experience I knew coughs could hang around for weeks. Plus, for those of you who know Joshua, he can be...well...irritable and ornery whether he's sick or not. Makes it a little tough to tell the difference between not feeling well, and just being ornery!


We knew something was up though when he didn't even want the camera around. Mike couldn't get him to smile for anything!

So, on we went into the following week with a very irritated boy. Not to mention that for anyone who has either had a bad cough or been around someone 24/7 who has a bad cough, you know how irritating it becomes for the non-cougher to constantly hear that sound. Needless to say I was becoming quite irritated myself with the endless cough. Then you add in "mother's guilt" because I was also losing my compassion...it was a very long illness...and it was only going to get worse!

Communion

As in receiving communion during mass at our church. Mike and I up until a few weeks ago have still been receiving communion at our church. We are devout Catholics and felt it important to still take communion even though it contains gluten. Mike hadn't noticed any real difference, (although I swear he acted differently when he went without), but I most definitely did. Within that day and over the next few days I began to feel the effects. Crampy, gassy and bloating...that's just to name a few without going into disgusting details. I hadn't noticed these issues while I was pregnant. But it certainly could have been there but showing itself in the hive issues I was having.

I had asked Mike to get a hold of our priest to discuss what we should do because I would just go up, and as discreetly as possible make a bee line for the wine, avoiding the host. Not really the Catholic thing to do. I felt guilty, and empty not being able to receive. As Father Marc later said when we spoke with him, "The Body of Christ shouldn't make anyone sick!"

Come to find out, Father Marc was already in the process of ordering these special low-gluten hosts for the parish. There are two other people who have requested them as well. He referred us to this website: http://benedictinesisters.org/english/site.php to see what it was he was offering us.

According to the information:

"The Celiac community’s response to us... Since we began selling these breads we have served over 2000 celiac sufferers. We have had only positive feedback from those who have tried them. Our low gluten altar breads were featured in an article in the magazine Gluten-Free Living. The editorial and accompanying write-up cited data from the Center for Celiac Research that showed that the 0.01% gluten content of our breads would be perfectly safe for most celiacs. The article states

The measurement cited here, 0.01%, represents 10 PPMs (parts per million). But the more important number is 37 micrograms, because it is daily exposure to gluten that counts. The best current information shows that 10 milligrams a day should be safe.
Ten milligrams is the same as 10,000 micrograms. If you divide 37 micrograms into 10,000 micrograms, you will find that you would have to eat 270 wafers every day to reach the danger point. At most, celiacs would consume one wafer per day or about 0.04% (four tenths of one percent) of the amount considered dangerous."

The one downside, at least from Mike's point of view, is how we have to go and receive this special host. Because of cross contamination possibilities, our hosts are placed in a separate pyx so they can be consecrated during mass when the rest of the hosts are. However, because they use their hands to give them out, we would have to be the first ones to go up and receive. That's right. As soon as the priest comes down from behind the altar, we have to walk right up to him and receive our hosts before the rest of the parish goes up. This means we need to sit closer to the front of the church...with three children...who don't sit still...who don't stay quiet...and who most times gather many looks from the other people who are trying to LISTEN to the mass. Oooopppssss! :)

So, we will see if we have a reaction. It didn't taste bad, in fact it reminded me of a Cape Cod chip without the salt. We just don't know how sensitive we are. Ethan is still a few years away from receiving his First Holy Communion, so we'll see what will be available to him then. For now it's a step in the right direction. It's nice to see the Catholic community doing what it can for those of us with this disease, so that we may be able to participate in the most sacred part of our mass.

Her Big Day...and we had cake!

Yes, it was Rebekah's big day. On Sunday we had our daughter Rebekah Simone Ouellette baptized at Ste. Marie's Parish in Manchester. It was a beautiful ceremony with the whole congregation, family and friends to celebrate.

Ethan was very excited because although he hasn't been a big fan of going to church and praying to God, (more like not enjoying the hour of having to sit still in one spot), he was looking forward to seeing his sister "bathtized" like his cousin Jack was a few weekends ago. I tried searching in vain for pictures of Ethan's baptism, unfortunately a lot of those things are still packed up from when we had the house on the market. He was confused as to why he couldn't be baptized again, and wanted Joshua to take a "bath" up there as well.

More importantly...in a 4 year olds world...there was cake. We have a friend from our church who is known as the Cake Lady. She has been making cakes out of her house for quite some time now. Before we started eating gluten free, she made Joshua's baptism cake, and we were blown away by not only the beauty of the cake, but the taste as well. Incredible! So, when we had a change in our diet, I was less than thrilled that we would have to find someone else to do it for us, or (gasp) do it myself! (For those of you who don't know, I love to bake and cook, but with everything else to do in prepartion for a party at one's own house, it's just easier to have one less thing to think about!) So, I talked to her about cross contamination etc. and told her what kind of cake mixes to use as well as discussed what goes into the frosting, and we've worked everything out. This cake was huge, four Namaste cake mixes, but knowing it wouldn't all get eaten, I was able to freeze a reasonable size of it for use at other parties. I am a planner by nature!:)

Throughout every part of the day...church...the drive to and from church...the whole morning prior to going to church after the cake was delivered...a frantic voice could be heard asking if it was time for cake yet. We have to give the kid credit, he did go through all the motions required of the big brother...

He sat for some really great pictures.

Then there was the party girl. It was tough to get her away from the protective older brother. He needed to know where she was at all times. Let me tell you, he didn't like to hear her cry. Every time she did, which was often, (hey you would too if you were wearing that beautiful yet itchy and hot gown) he would tell me it was time to change her into her princess dress.

The pink in the dress was so beautiful. I can truly appreciate this color now after having two rough and tumble boys. Plus, seeing her laying next to her "older" (by two months) cousing Jacob...aka Jack...I just can't get over how feminine and dainty she looks.

All in all it was such a beautiful day. Thank you to everyone who came to the church and back to our home later, to celebrate God's little blessing.

Rebekah, sweetheart, you are loved by so many friends and family members, but no one loves you more than Mommy, Daddy, and your two big brothers Ethan and Joshua. God Bless you little one.